cryobanking celebrity looks

In Uncategorized on September 29, 2009 at 12:48 am

Oh just join in the sarcasm with me for this one. I realize the once in a while crass of my nature.

Want your future baby to look like a star? You have the choice! At the California Cryobank you can see the potential hotness [yes, defined by looks] of your li’l tike with the click of a mouse.

From the site: “Researched and selected from the limitless expanses of the internet, CCB Donor Look-a-Likes™ can be actors, athletes, musicians, or anyone else famous enough to be found on the web… CCB Donor Look-a-Likes™ are judged to be the best of our subjective abilities.” And “while some banks charge extra for their “preferred” donors, CCB donors are all premium level, each possessing excellent health histories and unique individual interests and talents.” Fantastic! Looks and spotless health.

But what’s health! Does this mean future parents will never have to worry that their celebrity-esque tots will ever have cardiovascular diseases? And never worry of the costs of addictions or bouts of lonely here and there? Wait… Where does the great literature come from then? Is that in the “interests and talents?” Must be. Wow. What more could we ask for?

Oh yes: geniuses. But the Biopolitical Times Blog brings up the discussion that this may prove more “successful” than the Nobel Sperm Bank of ghost past. But the reasoning: “Given America’s obsession with celebrity and appearance, it wouldn’t be entirely surprising if companies pushing celebrity knock-off sperm see more demand than the Nobel sperm bank.”

Now. I find this a wee bit off. To think that Americans are the only ones that value looks is just downright unfair. While we are on this wagon: all of the great models come from Eastern Europe where they never eat and from the north of Latin America where plastic surgery is booming. Italy and France adore fashion which is by definition adoring hot looks. India has the new Hollywood, and we know what that brings: celebrities! I could also go on about China – they’ve got the web, too, probably censoring out the bad lookers anyway – and Southeast Asia and the look of the sex worker… but that might be in poor taste.

In short, I wonder in earnest, where exactly are the culture lines in hotness?

Partially related. Attraction at a glance is how species procreate. Evolution is neat like that. No biggy. (biologists, forgive the simplification) But I know there’s a cult following for smarties. And we all know that cult followings are where the cool is. Ref: Blade Runner. But that’s quite another post, isn’t it. And it probably exists.



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